apparently this blog turned 2 years old today. congratulations to me, or something.
Anonymous asked: What does 'jag är kåt' mean?
Anonymous asked: You're seriously one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen
I highly doubt that anon, but you are very sweet to say so and reading it made me smile, so thank you. thank you so much :3
Anonymous asked: I have a pair of 14 eyed docs, and I can't find a way to lace them the way I like. How do you lace your boots?
I couldnt find a good way to explain so I”ve made a short little video instead, I’ll post it now
so, here’s how I lace my boots. nothing fancy. it’s basically just over, under, over, under…. if that makes any sense.
Anonymous asked: How do you put up your mohawk? My hair are as long as yours but they don't want to stand up. :(
I just brush it, pull it up a little at a time and spray it, and then I use a blow dryer on it so that the hairspray stiffens. nowadays I have to spray a lot more than I used to do, because my hair is long and thin as fuck. but when I had a bit wider and thicker mohawk I didnt have to spray as much.
but yeah, a strong hairspray (I use the green syoss or the pink proffs) and a blowdryer.
if you want you can backcomb your hair, spray it a little bit and then pull it up and shape it, then spray a little again and then use the blow dryer.
I usually dont backcomb though, because it damages my hair quite a lot and I kinda think backcombing looks better on shorter mohawks. also, I like the “cleaner” look that you get when you dont backcomb.
short backcombed mohawk (not the best photo though)
and a longer, “cleaner” (I cant find a better word to describe it right now…) mohawk
but if your hair is thick and heavy you’re probably gonna have to backcomb and spray a lot before you pull it up, otherwise it wont hold throughout the day.
I’ve decided to do some opposite action. As I wrote the other day I’ve been feeling very fat, ugly and disgusting lately (more than I normally do). But instead of hiding from the world like I always do, I’m gonna do the opposite. I’m gonna take a shitload of selfies and try to find as many as possible that I like and then describe to myself why I like them. Then I’ll try to post some of them, even if I’m not completely happy and comfortable with how they turn out. I might even make a video, since I’ve been promising that for a long time.
So yeah that’s the first step… and it might backfire on me, and leave me feeling even worse, but I mean I can either just sit here and feel like shit or do something and maybe end up feeling a little bit better.
Also, I’ve made plans to hang out with some old friends tomorrow, which is kind of a huge thing because I basically never do that. But those guys are fucking awesome and I always have fun with them so I’m sure things will get a bit better soon, even if tonights selfie-session doesnt work out.
These last couple of days have been really fucking shitty. I had a panic attack during social studies on Monday, but the teacher was really great and took me outside and just talked to me and gave me her phone number and said “call me ANYTIME you want or need to talk. You can call me in five minutes even, I’ll just give the other students something to do while I’m gone and you and I can talk” and that was really sweet of her.
Didn’t take her up on that though. I don’t talk on phones, except with Tomas and sometimes my family members (when they call I get paranoid and think that someone has died so then I have to answer to find out).
I just feel so disgusted with myself. I’m in a complete FFÄ (fet, ful, äcklig = fat, ugly, disgusting) state of mind and I can’t get out of it. When I have lows like this I usually spend a lot of time thinking up ideas of how to change myself so that I don’t look as disgusting and ugly, and the main thing I end up doing to feel better about myself is dye my hair, because it’s often a quick and easy fix you know. And I have an idea for my hair now, but every time I look in the mirror, even though I hate what I see, I still like my hair as it is, somewhat. And I’m scared that I’ll just look worse in every other color. And I don’t want to bleach it and damage it even more because it would probably fall off (that’s why I haven’t fixed my regrowth yet, because I would have to bleach all my hair to get an even color).
I’ve also been thinking about removing almost all my facial piercings, but I know I would regret it. And I don’t know I want to change everything about myself but I’m also really scared of making changes because I mean it’s a lost cause and it’s like, what’s it called… putting makeup on a pig. I can’t make myself beautiful or interesting or sexy or cute or whatever, because I’m not. I’m just this ugly fucking piece of…. nothing.
Jag är ingenting, ingenting alls.